Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Knowing is aging

Ramblings Post #66
This year I had a birthday I've always envisioned as something so far off it was always ages and ages away. And now that I am that age I used to laugh at, karma has come in from doing the yard and started pointing out all those little things I used to think should never have to me. Not the big stuff, the little stuff. What little stuff? Read on...

Wanna know how you know you're old?

When you hurt yourself, not playing basketball, or working in the yard, or slipping in the bathtub, but reaching for the alarm clock.

I have a horrible habit in that I've found out, or figured out, how to turn off my alarm clock in my sleep. Well, not turn off but hit the snooze. Which is kinda why my alarm is set for 6am, but I don't actually wake until well after 7am.

To combat this I move the clock around the nightstand, to the floor, to the other side of the bed, etc. I'm considering buying another alarm clock that requires more than a button tap to get to the snooze part. I've also considered sleeping with someone who'll actually get up when the alarm goes off. Let's just say there are plans in "flux".

But Monday morning, as the alarm went off for what had to be the 8th or 9th time I reached out this time semi-awake to get a few more minutes. The clock was just out of my reach. Apparently the previous time I'd hit the snooze when I rolled back over into the covers I had rolled a little farther away. I stretched out just a touch. Didn't make it. I stretched a little more...

...and my wrist popped.

I was damn sure awake then. I could move my fingers and all that, but it sure hurt like hell.

I hurt myself trying to turn off my alarm clock. I've been in car accidents, run into walls and doors, and nothing hurt quite like this. I mean this hurt like a mofo. I could barely hold a pen and doing all the things I normally do one handed really wasn't the move.

And hurt till this morning. Maybe it was a wrist sprain.

I started to get gray at 22, so that really wasn't a feeling of being old to me when the gray started coming in a little stronger. And I've been out running the streets since sometime in late 80's, from college to my hometown and finally in Atlanta for a decade, so my slowing down and getting a little weary of the "scene" didn't strike me as me getting old, I'd had my good time, and some of yours. But hurting yourself just moving? I mean damn. Is there another sign of being old?

Maybe I'll get me some vitamins or something.

Barkeep, let me get a Centrum Martini.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Mickey and Jerry in for a visit

Ramblings Post #65
There are things I just inherently don't do. I do not do hot pants. Anymore. I don't do heights, but only because having to call the fire department to get a grown ass man off a one story roof is ridiculously embarrassing. And as you just found out, I don't really do cheese. But wait, there's more. Read on...

Slim called for the first time in forever. She's been on the down low for a minute, and still has a while to go so I wasn't expecting a word from her. She was in a automobile wreck a while back, totaled her car and broke her foot. She's in therapy and has been out of the game, but last night she called because she has a little visitor she can't get rid of.

She as a mouse.

And as a big strong he-man type, she over course called yours truly to handle the situation. And that would have been cool. Except I'm allergic to rodents. Small and hairy? My eyes will swell up, my body starts aching, I sneeze like I caught the bird flu. It's not good. But then that's how I would know if I've got a problem at my house. I start sneezing and aching for no real reason? Time to call my exterminator, because the furry ones have come to visit. But despite my allergies, after class I rode over to play Tom Cat to her visitor Jerry.

She's put on a few pounds, but then I always thought she was too thin, but it looks good on her. It's not often you meet a plump vegetarian. A pleasingly plump vegetarian.

I did a sweep of the grounds, she had already laid out the sticky traps so I put out the neck snappers (using her $8 brie cheese ) and afterwards we caught up. She's thinking about starting a blog, or a website since she's basically just chillin' all day and I gave her a few addresses and ideas. I admonished her for not having a lawyer (see legal mind popping out already). And before I ended up having to get doped up on benedryl and vodka to make to the morning, I skeddaled.

And when I got home, I marveled at my exterminator's prowess, because I need to clean up. Bad.

Barkeep. A little cleaning music and kickstart beverage.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Bar chatter

Bar Chatter #7
When it's not enough to make a post, but deserves to go out to the world... it's just Bar Chatter.

Boston Market must be better than I think. I ran out at lunchtime to knock off a few errands, and on the way back in I decided to forgo the burgers, taco, subs, fried chicken or wings and get something at least semi-decent. So I stopped at Boston Market.

Lunch for one at Boston Market was $11.00.

The actual bill. Yeah, I ate it, I was hungry.

Do they know it's a recession? Why is there no value menu? And it's not like the joint was empty at nearly 1:30pm either, they had more than a few folks eating. On the way back I passed a closed TGI Fridays, a closed BBQ joint, a closed french bakery and yet the Boston Market charging $11.00 a head for lunch is still open?

Did I miss something?

Friday, October 23, 2009

So they loaded up the Truck, and moved...

Ramblings Post #65
A shrewd investor I read back in the day, when I read investment advice like some men read a sports page, advised that during a calamity, one needs to look for bargains. And if the current state of Wall Street isn't a calamity, I'm not sure what would qualify. The problem I have now is that my tools are so rusty, I can't accurately tell what's a deal and what isn't. Now I at one time had the skills....think about what the Moguls are up against.

"So I made $3,000 like a month ago. But then this month I've lost $4,0000. And I spent $2,000 getting my car fixed. But if this other stock ...."

And the moguls continue.

It still amazing to me that Naive Mogul still has a belief that he can beat the market. Listening to him and Daddy Mogul talk - and it's not like I'm trying to listen, he talks loud - the concept that maybe just maybe they can't win just has not occurred to him. At any point. Not in all the months he's been trying. Naive Mogul is afraid that at the end of the year he'll have to cut his losses and see if he can get some more money - cry to his father - so he can invest again. Actually, I believe the word he used was play.

Even in the worst of times, those privileged live in a fantasy world.

He hasn't realized that like in Vegas, the only way to win is if you own the casino.

Chatty Mogul has rejoined the general work group, and by his own estimation the days seem to go a lot faster as of late. Well, since he's working as opposed to sitting about and talking about his 1) house, 2) dog, 3) diet, 4) inventions, 5) his grand ideas for the future, or whatever other crazy thought strikes him.

Side note: Two weeks ago Chatty was considering law school. I advised him to get a study guide and maybe take a prep course before taking the LSAT, but he figured he would just go take it cold to see what it was all about, then if he felt he could do it, he would study and take it again. When advised against doing that, and why that was a horrendously bad idea (they would average the scores, not take the highest) he quickly lost interest.

After Naive and Daddy discussed their losses for at least 20 minutes - this stock won't move, this other stock took a dive, etc and so on, they started on Daddy Mogul's new health plan. Which is infinitely more interesting, as the man is actually losing weight. The point where their "boss" walked by and asked what they were doing. When the boss (and my boss too), who is only in the office maybe twice a week, and in our area away from her multiple meetings, for maybe and hour or so a day, can spot you're not really working, what's really going on.

I mean really.

Am I wrong for hoping Naive gets wiped out? And actually has to maybe, do his job to live? Then I guess I'll just have to be wrong.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009


Ramblings Post #64
Everything isn't for everybody. Some of us have no business eating shellfish, some of us need to re-think skinny jeans, some of us need to stop at the first glass of whatever we're drinking and let's just say that certain clothes need to stop at certain sizes. And moreover (legal word) there are things that some of us just don't like. And we shouldn't have to put up them all the damn time.

Why cheese?

This morning I went down to the lady who makes the breakfast sandwiches and got what I had hoped to be a nice bacon and egg sandwich on multi-grain bread. Chatting with a co-worker who had just discovered YouTube, my tummy was ready for a little touch up before lunch, and then my later classes. So, I get my little styrofoam container head back up, grab a cup of coffee (it's free) and settle in the do a little munching.

No bacon. But a liberal slathering of cheese.I'm not a big cheese fan. Oh, I'll eat pizza, and sometimes even get extra cheese as a topping. But on my sandwiches? No. I don't even eat mac and cheese unless she's really cute. I make a reportedly delicious grilled cheese sandwich - you need a touch of garlic salt and two kinds of cheese (I've never actually tasted it) - and my baked pasta is the kind that makes you look at me cross eyed. But I'm so not into cheese on everything. I don't want it on my taco, my hamburger, my french fries, my salad, my fish sandwich, my hot dog, my hash browns, my grits, or as a basic add on to anything else on a menu.

So why does everybody offer to throw on piece of cheese like they're doing me a favor? When did a thin piece of cheese because a value item? At Wendy's they throw the cheese on like they're trying to get rid of it! Why do you have to ask for something without cheese anyway? They should have to ask if you WANT cheese. Like loving cheese is the default or something.

I'm not the crazy one. They are the crazy ones.

Meat, bread, ketchup, maybe a little mustard. Topped with french fries. And the occasional lettuce and tomato. And Fried onions. And if you got one of the sesame seed buns or a kaiser bun great. A little steak sauce isn't the end of the world. BBQ sauce if we're on the grill. But no, and I repeat, no cheese. Seriously.


Barkeep. If you're serving cheese martini's so help me I will....

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Fill in the spaces

Ramblings Post #63
We all get busy. There's the thing, and then the other thing, and that stuff we were supposed to do but we forgot, and then that other thing and before you know you forgot something. And then you're really in trouble. Luckily for me, this a truly optional blog. So I'm not in trouble. I think.

It's been a minute since I blogged, well a few days or such, and well, nothing much has been going on.

Oh, I had a break in attempt at the house. And since I actually have something worth stealing at this point, that was as tense a few moments as I've had in a while. But once the villains had broken the window, they apparently couldn't figure how to get inside without gouging an artery or two on the broken glass. So, I'm only out a window and medication for high blood pressure.

And, the finals for this semester schedule is out, and my finals are back to back, well, there is a day in between but since the prep is so tight, that's the equivalent of back to back. For the first time EVER, I'll be out for a whole week either taking a final or getting ready for one. Either I'm about to prove my worth the company, or they're going to realize they really don't need me. The rubber meets the road.

And I'm worried about Sporty. who suddenly is a character from a Terry McMillan black chick lit novel. For the first time she showed and interest into returning to Atlanta (well, she announced she's looking for work here), and though our long IM conversations, I can almost feel a change in her. She's much more spiritual, and her outlook on certain aspects of life seemed to have changed. I do so wonder what the hell happened to her in Texas, because it seems it was a life changer. One day when she's ready, she'll tell me.

And I need to get back on salads. As I've explained before, although I'm lovable and huggable , funny and urbane, learned and generous....all of that goes by the wayside unless you possess six pack abs. And I'm way down as of late, I mean in the mirror I'm not looking too shabby. And that's with the glasses on! After school wrecked my workout schedule, I was on a salad a day for while. But that got real expensive - Chick-fil-et, Zaxby's, Wendy's and whoever else sold the leafy green stuff because I'm too lazy to toss some greens at the house. Maybe salads at night.

The moved the Moguls around at the job. Chatty Mogul gave up his cush job because it was, and you can quote me, "too much pressure". This from a man who worked maybe an hour a day. And after a shift in the org structure, it's just a matter of time before Naive Mogul talks himself out of a job, because he new boss doesn't like him as much as his old boss. Or sleeps himself out of a job. Or as Daddy Mogul put it this morning, "Migraine? Is that what they call a hangover these days?"

My days are wakeup, wakeup again, turn off the alarm while awake this time, get up when the alarm off again, morning absolution, go to work, avoid strangling anyone, go to class, go home study, sleep, repeat.

So , as I said. Nothing much has been going on.

Barkeep, B-12 and some powerade. Sporty really likes powerade.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Democratic Stalemates and Chicago Presidents..

This is a political post. Well, part political post, part political fantasy. Man I'm getting old, I used to dream I played football.

A little while ago, holding a bulletproof majority in the Senate and a drunken reprobate margin in the House, the Democratic Party managed to shoot itself in the foot and not get passed any reform at all, with or without the public option, or really do anything when you think about it.

First, so there is no confusion, the public option is basically a government insurance company. It's not a take over or anything like it, unless you realize that once a player with no profit motive enters the field, a whole lot of insurance companies will have some explaining to do. I think one firm had an 89% profit increase, while only increasing the customer base 24%? Oh, and their profits will drop. Although profiting off of people's health feels unseemingly if you don't have a medical degree of some kind.

So, why does the party with all the chips seem to be dancing with themselves? Well, probably because the Democrats are the party of inclusion, which means everybody can join. Unlike the seemingly Borg cloned Republican party, the party currently in charge of America is so diverse it can't agree on soup and salad vs. salad and soup.

Obama was a constitutional law professor before the senate and his current job, and as I've taken constitutional law (or rather am currently taking) I can understand his methodology to some degree. The President isn't supposed to make laws. Which is why he didn't go to Congress with a pre-written INSURANCE reform bill (it's not really a "health care" issue) and tell them to pass this, much like Clinton tried. He knew he could set the agenda, but it was up Congress to work out the nuts and bolts. Forgive him for trying to work the system.

Add in that this is the first time the Democrats have been in power in almost twenty years and that it takes a special kind of person to even run for a job in Congress and what you get are little power mad "my way" rogue agents with a made gleam in their eyes and their own private agendas, looking for a leg up or a high sign. The Blue Dog Democrats, the Gang of Three, and whoever else where it wasn't negotiation but three to ten individual people holding the nation hostage.

His own people are raining on his parade.

Obama isn't one for drama, so let's be glad I'm not President. Dramatic statement would be the course of the day. Even Fox "News" would pick up the feed. I'd be the "damned" Chicago President. I'd show up on Capitol Hill one morning with my Secret Service Team in tow, and bum rush Congress. I'd start at Nancy Pelosi's office and basically ask her if she was with me or against me on Health Care. She can have her own opinions on other things, but for this it's cut and dried. Thirty seconds. And if she joined up, I'd make her tag along while I hit the next office with the same line. Until I was walking around with 20 or 25 senators. And then when I get to the holdouts, it would be browbeat time. With me or you can go home now, because whatever you put up, the Republicans will vote down and the folks behind will too, for the rest of the time I'm in office. Maybe its a bluff, maybe not.

By like 3pm, Health care, er...Insurance reform would pass.

Sometimes, with people used to being coddled and begged, you have to knock them out of their comfort zone.

Supposedly Pete Rozelle, when he met an impasse trying to merge the then established NFL and the upstart AFL into the single behemoth we know today, told the team owners that nobody was leaving the room until they figured it out how to balance everything up. The owners, rich powerful men used to having people jump when they called, all laughed and went ahead to argue for hours. Then around 4pm, guys with cots and pillows showed up. Dinner was brought in. Everybody stopped laughing. They got it done in less than 48 hours.

Somebody call the White House. I know where Obama can get a deal on 435 cots. For cheap.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Bar Chatter

Bar Chatter #6
When it's not enough to make a post, but deserves to go out to the world... it's just Bar Chatter.

I've pretty much stopped eating.

I'm down to the one meal a day. Well, one good meal and maybe a snack or two. And I wish I could say it was due to my renewed commitment to health and the betterment of me as a person, when in reality, it's because I've gotten lazy. My kitchen is relatively clean and after the bug guy makes his 3 month check - that was money well spent, believe it - it's gonna be even cleaner. And since I don't get home until 9pm or so three nights...and I sleep in on weekends...

I think I need some vitamins.