Tiger Woo!

Ramblings Post #366
Sometimes you get it back. You know what I mean. You don't know when you lost it, or where you lost it, you don't know how you lost it, but you know you don't have it right now. So you stop take a deep breath and re-assess yourself. Then you buckle your chinstrap, wipe away the sweat and go back in and finish that damned cheese log. That really is not the best sports metaphor. 

I still have the Tiger Woods branded golf game for the PS3. I still have a PS3. I also still have about ten or fifteen courses I've still not played from that game's DLC I purchased (as much as I dislike DLC, it isn't ALL bad). But, I have played the version of Augusta National carried on that version. To say that course is hard, well, I couldn't even win there with the game on the easy mode. Bobby Jones was either a master of the game or a diabolical genius. And while the rise of Tiger in his youth didn't get me interested in golf (The neighborhood I grew up in was golf course adjacent and there was this Sega PGA game in early nineties) it did bring my attention back to this headache of game.

If all goes well, my new Saturday mornings will happen at this driving range not too far from the house and include a big bucket of balls. But that's been a plan. 

I can honestly say I was one of those who did not think that Tiger could get back to this level. Retirement as suggested by many seemed a bit extreme, but the idea of his once vaunted domination returning seemed a low probability idea. Even after the surgeries he could still play - much better than me - an so I was of the opinion that if he could play average golf for four days and then be able to pull off four or five old school Tiger moments he would be competitive. At his prime he was so much better than everyone else that even at 75% he was dangerous. No domination, but able to make people sweat a bit. This I did not expect. 

The mark of true champion is finding new ways to win when the old ways are no longer available. Like a quarterback who no longer has a deep threat arm or a great scramble and turns into fantastic game manager, so too did Tiger have to figure out a new path to victory. Since the incident that lead to his downfall, the subsequent depression and the injuries from what he had been putting his body through to get his peak, he hadn't been the same. And now the raw power isn't there any more after the spinal fusion surgery to fix his ailing back. So many suggested that he just retire with dignity - head to the booth, design some courses. But playing is what drives him. So he had to "figure out his angles." Which he did, which is extremely impressive in as unforgiving a game as golf. Going from winning by 21 to winning by 1 matters only to the bettors, a win is still a win. And to do it at Augusta, on one of the hardest of courses against some of the best in the game? Remarkable.

Sport is funny. We love winners and great comeback stories. We let things go for the feeling of triumph.

Barkeep, get that man a beer. And since he's a member of the club and I'm not, put it on his tab.

World Cup, France, what a game.

Ramblings Post #352
Sport brings people together. We've known that in the South for years. It's place where a black male can have free reign to do pretty much whatever the hell he wants...provided he wins on Saturday (or Friday if you live in small enough town.) And it's nice to see that sport binds us all worldwide, it is interesting to find out that the same self mental trickery is just as constant. 

I think this was the first time I ever actually watched the World Cup. You know, the rest of the world's version of the Superbowl. Only bigger.

I played futbol (soccer) up through my formative years if you can believe it. Back before I discovered beer and cheez doodles I used to play center half, a position that could run up to six miles during a game. Ah, where the did the time go. Soccer really is a beautiful game...to play. To watch it is pretty much crap. Even for some one like me, who knows the game - and still plays it with Football Manager 13', 14' and 15' (the last couple seasons have just been window dressing honestly). So to sit down and actually watch it was different. I work with people who save up and go - and I think one guy at the ranch actually flew over to see a game live. Maybe. 

In any case it wasn't bad. Like a regular game it was fast at times, slow at times. I hated the ref. I screamed at the screen. I watched a good portion of it. Up until Kylian Mbappé scored France's fourth goal. At that point anyone expecting a Croatian comeback was looking for a repeat of the Patriots-Falcons fiasco. Twice in one lifetime? Probably not.

So congrats France. With your whole team full of immigrants. And Muslims. Who you supposedly don't want in your country.

No seriously. Congrats.

Ayesha NO!

Ramblings Post #315
I'm not one to to try and go parent anyone, especially not anyone grown. If you're old enough to drink and get a light bill, then you're old enough to realize that actions have consequences. Consequences and Repercussions. A lot of people younger than me want to act like this is no longer true, like the idea of freedom means being free from the results of your actions. It doesn't. You reap what you sow. Unless you're a superstar athlete, in which case I'm sure we can work something out.

I still think the Warriors can win it all in a ONE game Championship.

Somebody get Ayesha's phone right now. Please. She about to eff' up the church money!

Look I'm not saying that some very improbable coincidental coincidences, if you will, appear to have taken place during this year's NBA finals. And I'm not saying that the league has no interest in seeing a seven game series between what is now it's old phenom versus its new phenom. And I'm not saying a little drama isn't good for the series ratings. I'm not saying a lot of things. But I AM saying that her making a statement about a league approved "fix" doesn't really play out well for anyone. Not her, not the hubs, nobody I can get an eye on.

 At the start of the series, Golden State was head and shoulders above the Cavaliers, and a sweep looked highly possible. The two stars were coasting, wait, they weren't even coasting they were on the bench resting, and the Cavs were getting run up and down the floor like the middle school kids playing at the Rucker. Adjustments were made and nothing changed. The Cavs won their home game, but then we kind of expect you win ONE at home. Then it looked like it was over. Only....the Warriors had just come back from three down in the previous series. So it is possible. So, never before, but now twice in one season? That Tyronn Lue, Cleveland's coach puppet, somehow has crafted something magical?

Um...

Look, LeBron is a great basketball player. Physically gifted, good hands, a sweet shot and with an eye and head for the game. But... for the most part when pressed he plays the game in real life like I play on 2K : How many fouls can I get called on the other team so I can play the scrubs? Maybe it's strategic, they used to call it "working the refs," so I understand it. In theory. But if every time LeBron looked over to the ref hoping for a foul, you had to take a shot of vodka, you wouldn't make it past the first quarter. It's become excessive and annoying if not a defining trait. It looks like whining. And it's irritating to watch someone skilled try to manipulate their way to even more of an advantage. Watching the game this less than sporting sportsmanship seems to have infected the rest of his teammates as well. We already don't have hand checking, like damn. I'm not saying that it maybe one of the reasons ratings are down, but then I'm not saying a lot of things.

The Cavs have hung around long enough to get their groove back. They're a good team, no doubt. But they shouldn't have had the opportunity. And now that they're rolling again, it's a one game championship, which is what the league tries avoid by having a series.

And someone tell Ayesha to relax. The Warriors look like the Showtime Lakers out there. Let Bron-Bron get his last little shot at this. The Warriors will be back in this "isht" for seasons to come if nobody gets the big head. 

Barkeep, let me get some beer. No, I'm serious. Just one though. Gotta watch my figure.

Sometimes you win, and sometimes you get your a......

Ramblings Post #266
It is my opinion that every child should play a team sport. Soccer, baseball, field hockey, something. So that they can learn teamwork. And how to take instruction.  And that even if you're very good, you still need the rest of the team to participate. And learning to play your specific role in the overall success of the group. And how to lose. And how losing is not the end of the world, and you have to get ready for the next play/batter/volley/game no matter what. Might make the whole world a little bit better place. I'm just saying. 

Graphic from Reddit...

Americans who don't follow soccer might have some trouble grasping the magnitude of the loss Brazil suffered at the hands of Germany yesterday. So let me put it in perspective.

Remember this year's Superbowl? Where all-world quarterback Peyton Manning of the heavily favored Broncos flubbed the snap on the first play of the game and it resulted in a safety? Yes?  Think of that, only imagine they gave fourteen points for safeties. And that Manning repeated that same fumble the next four or five times the Broncos got the ball. Each one resulting in a fourteen point safety. Kinda like that.

It's not really that Germany beat Brazil, it was how they did it. These were supposed to be evenly matched teams squaring off in a duel of strategy. But it turned into a squad of pros versus a city league team in the blink of an eye. The Gas House Gorillas. Ugly doesn't begin to cover it. 

I didn't see most of the game, been very busy, tuned right before halftime and thought the counter was
broken. Then checked ESPN just to make sure and clicked it right back off. Caught the highlights around midnight. The score reminded me of my childhood, where they city league makes the mistake of putting five or six big kids on the same team. I remember that because they did that when I was playing....and lord, as one of those 'big kids' we should have exercised a little sportsmanship. Should have. Like what what the Germans did, a just kind of run the clock out strategy for the second half. Something you really don't see too often at the top level.

I hope that somebody took the Brazilian team out for Pizza and Root Beer afterwards. Or at least milkshakes. I'm just saying.

Barkeep, although I really shouldn't could I get a french vanilla milkshake? Yes, whipped cream.

And at the top of the hour....

Ramblings Post #225
I'm about to say some things that might be taken in the wrong way. It happens. I'll live. But it's been a minute, I've been slapping letters on paper here and there and getting over a cold...or the flu...or the plague, so I decided to chime in. Something to do. Since gutting the transfer budget won't get me enough money to keep even one of my....never mind. A bit of rage quit. This isn't so much a rant as commentary. Edited down because halfway through I kinda answered a question of my own and didn't see the point of exposing my own ignorance. Or at least that much of my own ignorance. 

If the NBA player who came out of the closet had shot the ball like Jordan or Lebron, not only would there be no voices of dissent in the locker room, his fellow players would be ready to brawl in the street if you said anything bad about him. It's a team thing. That's just my opinion now, because maybe fervent religious belief is bigger than sport. But I'm from the south...where Roll Tide can be substituted for Amen under the right circumstances.

Jason Collins, former Celtic and Wizard, said "I'm a 34-year-old NBA center. I'm black. And I'm gay."  I wonder if he'd done this in mid-season, when he had a team, what the reaction would have been. Don't get me wrong, doing this just after the season closed so it wouldn't be a distraction to the team was gracious on his part. But he's a free agent, he has no current locker room in which to stand. And he's 34, on the tail end of his career. He's a player in a professional sport because he hasn't turned in the required league retirement paperwork.

And by announcing it now he's also placed himself in a dicey position. As one commentator put it, he's a position where if he gets picked up next season, it could look like a publicity stunt. But if he's not picked up, it's because he's gay and discrimination is afoot. Rock and hard place. Now, by dint of the sheer number of professional athletes there have to be a few hundred gay men who suit up and play some "game" at the professional level each week. And teams replace those players all the time, for a variety of reasons. You see where I'm going with that. I'm just theorizing here, spitting out hypotheticals if you will.

On another note, another commentator I heard today also mentioned for some reason the "I'm black" part as being important. Why I don't know. As though he might be the first gay black person ever. Probably not. As though black people don't accept gay people. Um, yeah. We kinda do. Maybe I should have listened more, but I was getting a haircut at the time.

Now, as I said, I'm from the South. Where, if you can play football on Saturday with great ability, why it doesn't matter what your race or religion might be. Sport transcends if you will. Black, White, Indian, smart, stupid, crazy, it doesn't matter. So gay probably won't matter either. If you can play. It's unfair, but it's not new, its wrong in the same way that as long as we can remember the abusive high school jocks are treated as young gods because they can break a tackle on a fine Friday night. It's not crazy...it's sports. (via ESPN).

And since when is life fair?

Barkeep. Roll Tide.

(I'm not really an Alabama fan, I'm just trying to make a point.)

The NFL goes WWE...AGAIN!

Ramblings Post #200
After writing all this in a burst of fury after the game, then letting it sit for few minutes, well for a few hours....I downloaded a .gif of the play - and watched it through maybe fifty times. Got a couple of screen grabs. Blew them up, ran them through some filters to clear them up. Read the NFL Rule book. Checked a few message boards, got some insight. I can see why the replay officials might have an issue overturning it. Might. Because as I understand it, once simultaneous catch is ruled on the field that the replay officials aren't looking at that, but only if there was enough evidence to overturn the touchdown call made. But then that speaks to something else.

Man those folks at ZipMeme are fast! Game wasn't over five minutes when this popped up

You have got to be kidding me. Now, I like the rest of the nation watched as the NFL started this season with work stoppage - the refs. Nobody ever really likes the refs, we tolerate them, but we gain a grudging respect for them over time. Occasionally you would see one you recognize and realize, much like a boxing fan seeing Mills Lane in the ring, that even if you didn't like the calls you knew that it would be fair.

We never really knew how much we would miss them until they were gone.

A travesty of officiating has taken place over the past few weeks. The replacement refs, made up of not second string (people hoping to be NFL refs after the labor strife, so they bowed out) but of third string penalty callers have wreaked havoc with the game. Ten minute delays as they sort through things. Mystery penalties. Extra challenges awarded to one team. Although the league would claim that the outcome of no game had been affected. 

Really? You give someone two extra challenges and the outcome wasn't affected? A non-call becomes a call and a drive stays alive - doesn't affect a game? A twenty seven yard penalty for unnecessary roughness from the wrong spot on the field - doesn't affect a game? The replacement refs aren't affecting a game?  A you kidding me? Okay, maybe. I mean, I've only watched the game since I was a kid...I obviously have no clue! Whatever.

But then Monday night came. And the whereas a stout Seahawks team played an incredible game they should have lost to the Packers. Trailing by five, in a last second heave, the Hail Mary was sent. And aside from the missed obvious offensive pass interference call (shoving a defender in the back), the offensive receiver may have never actually had possession of the ball. I watched Golden Tate's right hand come in after the defender had two hands on the pigskin over and over again (via downloaded .gif). At best he's wrapping his arm around the ball pinned against the defender's chest.

The two officials giving opposing signals as they both stood three feet from the pile should have been the first clue this was about to go wrong. But all scoring calls are reviewed, so we're good.  But, as it turns out, the replay officials - who are the REAL REPLAY OFFICIALS, not replacements - can ONLY review the play AS CALLED. They can't tell the refs on the field  "hey, you should have called this," they can only review if there is enough evidence to overturn the call that has been made.  And the call on the field was touchdown.

The call was so bad that no reporter on Sportscenter, not one of at least 10 people, was willing to even defend it, not even to play devil's advocate. You could actually see the self control on the faces of the Packer players as they were interviewed about it. FB and Twitter got downright profane. My favorite tweet, a fake quote from WWE chairman Vince McMahon: "Even I know that was an interception."      

I compared this is the world of Wrestling for a reason. At least in the WWE, you expect bad officating. For the ref to get "distracted" by a heel. Or to get knocked and wake up just in time. It's part of the show, part of the story.  But pure sport, basketball, baseball and especially the NFL, is supposed to be above this sort of tomfoolery. 

Somebody call the White House. Obama needs to straighten this out.

The Olympics get shady

Ramblings Post #195
Sometimes you just have to find something a little off the beaten path to write about, so you can get your mind back to flowing the way it should. I've had a few things mulling over in my mind the past few days, and this is the first one that popped out. Well, the first one that popped out that looked finished. Well, the first one that looked like...aw forget it.

I don't really watch the Olympics. Not even the women's volleyball competition. Yes, I'm still salty about that Big Mac from twenty five years ago, and although I bear the games no ill will...it just doesn't dazzle me. The last time I got excited about was when the games were in Atlanta, and I could have (but didn't) ridden down and seen the world. And the opening ceremonies in Bejing were nice. But I really don't get into the sports like that...too many, too fast, where I end up cheering for reasons I'm not sure. Do I yell to sweep faster in the curling competition, or to use longer strokes. In the boxing the guy who got the knock down lost...on points. I get confused easily.

But what happened to Shin was troubling. 

In the NFL, they have fifteen angles of instant replay and will overturn a heinously bad call. In the NBA they will wave off a shot after the buzzer if the tape is clear. In the NHL, they can give you three angles of the puck in crease. In tennis, they will go to the cameras with frickin' lasers if there is a serious question of on the line or not.  So here at the Olympics, you figure they at least will have replay. Or least VHS. Super 8 maybe? So on the world stage, possibly the biggest fencing stage it will see for the next four years, what happened should not have happened.

If you're unfamiliar with what occurred, Shin A Lam (South Korea) fought Bitta Heidemann (Germany) into what is in fencing, overtime.  Whoever won would proceed to the gold medal match.  In "sudden death" with one second left and the pair still locked in steely duel, the match paused.  When the judge called "engarde" to commence the action, Heidemann dipped inside, lunged and scored a touch...only the clock hadn't moved. Looking at the replay, that she had scored the touch in one second was highly doubtful. 

The South Korean coach immediately went to the judges. And apparently instead of going to the booth..or even looking at the film...they declared Heidemann the winner. The dubious nature of the touch, considering the gold medal is at stake should have given weight to the idea of a clear and undisputed winner.

Shin Lam, defiant.

Upset, with cause in my opinion, Lam refused to leave the platform. In fencing, leaving the platform is an acceptance of the judges ruling. She waited for more than 45 minutes, until her coach's further appeal was denied...and stayed defiant until security had to escort her out. I understand how the ruling on the floor was made, but how the appeal was denied I am baffled. An athlete trains for years for a moment in the sun...only to be denied because someone does not want to admit they made an error? One we could all see on the replay? For shame Olympic judges.

And they hold out on Big Mac's too. Oh, wait, that's just an Olympic sponsor.


Barkeep....something ruddy. I'm not sure what it means either, ruddy.

World Cup Fever

Ramblings Post #114
Sometimes, we look for excuses to do things. Like if I take the long way home to enjoy the car ride and de-stress, I can stop by the ice cream place because its on the way home and get that caramel shake with the chocolate bits that should be illegal for consumption it tastes so good. Or if we go ahead and do a test cook on the pie, just to make sure I still know the ingredients, well, then of course I'll have to taste it just to make sure. You know...excuses. So guess what I'm trying to make an excuse for now.


I was pulling for Paraguay.

I watched a little of the World Cup this summer. I'm not a big soccer fan (football fan for my international readers) and so it was kind of a passing fancy, something on TV. Like many American kid born after 1965, I played soccer as youth - in the city leagues where my team dominated (to the point we used to let the goalie score when we got bored) and in high school - where we got thrashed regularly. Side note - in high school I lettered in football and soccer.

So I'm familiar with the game.

And playing is different than watching, and I'm aware that watching soccer is...well, boring. For long stretches, nothing happens. But then so is baseball, hockey (soccer on ice), most tennis, etc, well, at least to me. The idea that it is bigger than "American" football to me is on some levels mystifing and on other levels completely understandable.

I mean, to play soccer, you need an open field, a ball, some guys and some space you consider the goals. Thus you can pretty much get it going anywhere, for very little start up cost, and the game you're playing is identical to that of professionals. It is no wonder that most of the world plays this and that it catches on very quickly.

For everything else you need some very specialized equipment - baseball: gloves, bat, baseball diamond - basketball: ball, hoops, special court - football: pads, helmets, ball, field, etc.

So I watched America get tossed, and the noted the fallacy of blind umpires was not confined to just this country, but what I was really hoping for was for Paraguay to win.

Why?

In case you hadn't heard, Larissa Riquelme, a big fan of her home country Paraguay and something of a model, said that if Paraguay won the World Cup, she'd run naked through the streets.

Here is a picture of Larissa. Or two.

So, when Spain knocked out Paraguay, let's just say, when does the NFL pre-season start?

Oh, wait. Law school. Yeah right.

Wait, what's that? She's getting naked anyway to salute the hard work of the Paraguayan Team? Don't you just love patriots?

Barkeep. Something strong. And from Paraguay.

A Neuterd Tiger

Ramblings Post #87
I grew up in a "spin" world. The facts can come out later, what the major concern is right now is "spin"; how can turn this situation so it looks good for me? How can I get this over with right now and not look any worse than necessary. So, I know spin when I see it. And I can tell good "spin" from bad "spin". And as a golfer Tiger should know spin, if only on the ball. And right now, Tiger has got subpar "spin". Bad even.

I'm still going over the PGA rule book, looking for the part that says if you "cheat on your wife" you can't play. Because I don't think it is in there. And if that isn't in there, what Tiger really needs to do is get back on a golf course and remind folks that he's a really phenomenal golfer.

Did he cheat on his wife? In a an eye popping spectacular fashion. But that heavily scripted bit of foolishness of a press conference somebody put together for him really isn't what he needed to do. The cat is out of the bag, we all know you're not really that boring even keel guy that you portrayed for all these years, so why is your apology a transparent attempt to try an get back into that guise?

Me? I would have sent him out with a drink in one hand, and told him to curse two or three times. And looking more than a little ragged. Sit down and look worn out. Have him say what we all know: "I had it all, but I fucked up it bad". Extol the virtues of his wife, apologize to the kids that he's sorry he hurt mommy. Let him ramble for few minutes. Curse a few more times. This would have actually help legitimize the tears it looked like he was holding back. I might have even let him *gasp* take one or two questions AND give honest answers before he apologized he couldn't do this anymore and walk out.

His handlers need to realize all that endorsement money that already left is gone and ain't coming back - that fakery is over. Trying to rebuild that "brand" is a lost cause. If they were real professionals, the new fakery should have begun now, and it shouldn't look anything like the old fakery. I guess just because somebody pays you do it, that doesn't make you a professional.

Barkeep. Tall. Cold. Alcoholic.

2007 Football Rant #1

I don't like the Patriots

I have no respect for Belichick, or Brady or Moss at this point. I have no respect for entire organization, the owner or commissioner Goodell.

I have no gripes with the way the team has manhandled opponent after opponent this season. They come out firing with a offense with outlet after outlet and rack up points like no team ever. They are crisp, efficient and focused. The problem is that they don't stop. Up by 30, they keep pounding. Up by 40 and the starting units are still on the field. It is the epitome of bad sportsmanship. And this from a team that needs to demonstrate good sportsmanship at every turn considering their recent track record.

And apart from bad sportsmanship, it demonstrates a complete lack of perspective on the part of the "trappist monk" of football. Brady is going to get hurt. Or Moss or Welker. Bad. The weekly column Tuesday Morning Quarterback will attribute it to the "Football Gods" angry at the hubris of the team. I and ESPN will attribute it a defensive end or linebacker with a free shot who will have Brady on the field saying "I'm Batman".

Some say the Pats are focused because they're angry. And I ask angry at what? Getting caught cheating? They're angry that they got busted? And beating everyone they meet with no remose badly will make us think better of them how? Because right now I think they're still cheating. And that they might have been cheating for some time.

I have no respect for Goodell because after he said they would get to the bottom of what the Patriots were doing, they destroyed the evidence after 4 days and let the matter go. With no explanation of what they found. And no secondary review.

I hope Taligabue didn't go too far.

Barkeep... a Sidecar, heavy on the Scotch.