The Final Pitch Meeting...

This is a political post. 

Open on a cold but clear Washington DC morning. You can feel the excitement in the air, something was about to happen.

Then there, in the sky. It is a man, a single man hurtling to earth. All eyes turned skyward, enthralled by his daring. Who would be so bold, so daring as to interrupt the swearing in of Joe Biden? Less than five hundred feet from the earth his parachute opens, a grand American Flag with a soaring eagle superimposed upon it. Cut to outside the gates guarding the Capitol Building forlorn supporters of the outgoing President who had prayed for a miracle suddenly feel their hearts leap with joy. Cheering wildly. The shots from across the nation all channels, the entire internet, suddenly switch to a live feed from the capitol.

He lands firmly at the top of the steps leading to the dais. His golden mane is perfect, shirtless his perfectly sculpted pecs and eight pack abs glisten with sweat and dignity. He is the embodiment of all good and true in America, the living embodiment of the perfect man. He is so amazing. He storms, no, almost Fred Astaire like, he dances down the steps. You see the crowd is in shock so nobody moves. As he starts the dancing down, the women are swooning at his rampant masculinity, the men cowed by the same. You can see the fear on their faces. At the bottom of the steps a hapless Obama tries to intervene but he is easily disposed of, almost casually, knocked aside as though he were an errant piece of paper. The golden one pushes a frail, stammering Biden aside, lays his hand across the offered Bible and growls at the quivering Chief Justice John Roberts, who we show has wet his pants. And he says, get this, he says "Swear me back in, I'm not going anywhere!"

Outside the fence the crowd ejaculates in joy, grown real men weeping tears of happiness that the truth had finally been revealed. The soldiers look at each other and immediately realize their beaten, you can see it on their faces. And then....

What? No good? I think the Q-Anon crowd will eat it up. My audience will love it! This could work, I'm telling you...

That's how I pictured Cheato trying to convince the Network to renew his contract for the President gig. Him and Guli at one side of the table, him huffing and puffing his way through the scenario, Guli doing hyping him up and doing sound effects. He's the master of the deal, I mean, he just needs another season.

And with that, this cycle of President comes to a long overdue close.

The reunion show is scheduled for a Federal Pen near you!