Who are you?
Or rather, who am I...to me? We know the question of how we are seen by others is one rife with the idea of multiple right answers, as how you're seen depends on where you are in your life, your relationship to the observer and a half dozen other factors. You're not the same person to your life mate as you are to your old college roommate. One of them has to hide the sweets and the other is projecting from a version of you that they haven't seen in more than twenty years. No, the real question is who are you to yourself? Not the bathroom mirror you who can sing or the kitchen you whose recipes are word for word back of the box perfect, but the real you. And more importantly, who is that person...to you?
It said you'll only going to spend your whole life with one person...YOURSELF. (Yes, very cliche.) So it is suggested that you learn to like that person. Or at least figure out how to get along. Because that person, yourself, is going to be the person who supports you, who makes sure that you get what you need, that hopefully loves you. So it's important that you know who that person really is. And not the version you show the job, or the version you show social media, or your mate, or friends. The real you. Who are they?
That's where it gets tricky. Because part of knowing who you are to yourself is taking the time in the quiet to listen to yourself and hear what you have to say to you. In an honest and forthright fashion because lying to yourself is a special kind of silly. Tell yourself the unvarnished truth, and what hopefully will happen is you'll discover why you are. Yes, this sounds like therapy doesn't it. But, once you know the why of you, then you can start the process of becoming the intentional you and not a you that is just the product of your experiences.
The rough part is that some of us know what we're going to say to ourselves and we're pretty sure we're not going to like it. Where we have to admit things to ourselves and deal with it. The ugly side. The unpleasant things. Our personal truths that we see as flawed. They may or may not be but we see them this way. This by the way is why far too many of us NEED our distractions - music, television, trips, going out, anything for something to do. Just like we avoid difficult conversations with other people instead of sitting with ourselves and listening we turn on some music or clean the house. For the third time this week. No, it's not that damn dusty. You just don't want to have that conversation.
Every year I implore people to do something, anything, but just be active because life is too short. This year I'm asking you sit down, with no music or television, no distractions and just listen to your own thoughts. Discover who you are. Listen to you. And try to understand who you really are, on your own terms, away from career and family, away from outside expectations and other influences. In an effort that I hope will set you on the path to becoming a very intentional version of yourself. Whatever that means to you (see what I did there?). Because life is too short to not understand who you are, to like who you are, to love who you are.
So, who are you?
